I've always been bummed that Rachel abandoned her elephant morph after #7.
Like, it would get referenced fairly often (how she’d do both at one time if she could) and she used it in special cases. But her elephant all but disappeared. And I loved Rachel’s elephant. It suited her over-the-topness really well.
Author’s summary: Born of a queen and king who loved their daughter long before she was concieved, I live my life in the shadow of a child who never existed, who was destroyed by my creation. Will they ever love me as they loved Small Lady?
One shot. It seems all is going as fated on the eve of Chibiusa’s birth, until the baby arrives curiously early, and turns out not to be Small Lady at all. Told from the perspective of this not-Chibiusa, I find myself torn between who I pity more, those who were robbed of something unspeakably precious, or the girl who is a living reminder of this tragedy. This story is chilling. It’s a beautiful exploration of expectation, loss, and compensation.
“Well, Ax-man, you’re right, you did call my attention to the possibilities on the Pool ship. And when you did that I guess I should have thought, Well, Jake, it’s a harsh, terrible thing to do, but you’re justified because, after all, you’re the victim here. But that’s not what I thought. You know what I thought?” Cassie released her grip on me. But Marco just took a step up close, right in my face. “I know what you thought, Jake. You thought Die, you filthy worms. Feel the fear, Yeerks. Feel the pain. Feel the helplessness. You wanted them to suffer and the idea of them suffering and dying made you happy. You were thrilled. You were high.” Cassie winced. She looked away. I said, “Yeah, Marco. That was about it: word for word.”
—54: The Beginning
Weird random semi-off-topic thought: does anyone remember how often Jake calls Ax “Ax-man” throughout the series? I know Marco and Tobias do, but does Jake as often? If so, cool. But if he normally doesn’t, this is speaking whole new volumes to me right now.
That struck me too, when I read this quote. I don’t recall him ever calling him that except for possibly early on before their relationship was established. I think that says a lot about something that happened in Jake. I’m not sure what exactly, but something.
Okay, so usually only Tobias and then Marco called Ax “Ax-man.” Jake did his damndest not to be the cynical, jaded, sarcastic asshole, at least not on the outside, because he couldn’t be. He had to be holding everyone together. But in this moment, there’s no pretense anymore of holding everyone together, so all that sarcastic cynical jadedness - which Marco and Tobias have always displayed - is now on the surface, and so his language is mimicking theirs.
That was phrased poorly, I think, but it communicates the basic idea I’m playing with here.